Are You Cable Ready?
by Jenifer Dana Miller
Before I start this article, you should know
that I don’t watch tv, cable or otherwise.
I have no interest in the trials and tribulations of the imaginary
characters on television shows. In
addition, the characters on these shows are stereotypes degrading to women
and minorities, and are just plain stupid.
Even the so-called “quality” dramas like ER and The West Wing don’t
appeal to me, and undoubtedly have the “dumb hick” and “bimbo” characters. And don’t get me started on the “reality” shows.
I’ve never wasted my time worrying about who would win the pot on American
Idol or Survivor. Cable television is just as bad, in fact, probably
worse because you have to pay to have the privilege of wasting your time watching
shlock like The Sopranos and Lifetime For Women.
I don’t feel like an outcast because I don’t
watch tv, and my life certainly hasn’t suffered.
I have many close friends, a great
About a year ago, I bought a unit in a cooperative
in Center City Philadelphia. The whole
idea of a cooperative is that the costs of running the building (utilities,
maintenance, upkeep) are split by the tenants.
A monthly carrying cost is paid by every unit, the amount of which
increases by the size of your unit.
Included in my monthly carrying cost is “free”
cable television. I have no doubt that
this costs the building at least $25/month per unit, and thus myself $25/month
in my carrying cost. However, I’m not
allowed to disconnect the cable and take a deduction in my monthly fees.
When I moved in, the “free” cable included
about 50 channels of non-premium stations.
Premium stations were available to individual units at their own expense,
so that the cooperative (effectively those not ordering the extra stations)
would not bear this additional cost.
Fifty stations seemed to me to be a reasonable
number of choices for the average downtown City dweller.
After all, part of the reason people live in Center City is all the
opportunities big City life offers. You
don’t need a car, and cultural, artistic, sports and outdoors activities are
all in easy reach. Center City is alive
and vibrant at night, and even after the worst snowstorms, the streets are
clear in a few hours.
Comcast Cable, however, was of the opinion that downtown Philadelphians require more cable stations and convinced my building that our antiquated cable was not giving residents all the channels they deserved, and that we needed to go digital.
My building, like most in the City, has an
antenna on the roof which allows tenants to receive cable television. This is analog-based, which, according to the
cable gurus, offers sub-par sound and picture
My building, unaware of the true motives
of the cable company, bought into this whole hog and spent months converting
every unit in the building to digital. Well,
not exactly digital. Here’s the kicker-
while all the units now get more “free” channels, we still are analog!
That’s right, we run on the same analog system
as before. The only difference is that
now the units have digital cable capability, and approximately 100 channels. What does that mean? That means that now Comcast now has the ability
to “sell” us the digital cable it decided we needed and gave us the ability
to have!
Once the upgrade began, I received under
my door (not in my mailbox), a packet about the important seminar Comcast
was having in the building’s rec room. The
packet explained that we all needed to buy digital cable and should attend
the meeting with our questions and checkbooks ready.
For just $29.99, I could have digital cable. For more money, I could buy up to 350 channels,
premium, and pay-per-view stations.
What was the $29.99 package? It was the same 100 channel cable package everyone was already getting for “free,” but in enhanced digital form.
It was the coveted opportunity to make a
$250/year, non-tax-deductible charitable donation to the cable tv tycoons. What makes digital worth the cost? In the literature distributed in my building,
digital was touted as having better sound and visual clarity (not that anyone
seemed to have any problems with the current quality). However, on
their website, the focus is on the increased
channel options.
Suddenly, the reason for the “upgrade” was
clear. Comcast wasn’t making enough money off Center
City high-rises due to the fact that buildings include it in the rent or monthly
charge. Residents therefore consider
cable to be free, even though its cost is passed along in the rent, and therefore
don’t opt to “pay” for the premium channels, the true money-makers.
Digital cable capability was Comcast’s way
to double the rates without increasing service.
This was achieved by “upgrading” the building from analog to digital
capability, continuing to charge the building same for cable service, then
convincing the residents they needed to shell out $29.99/month for the same
cable they previously had for free. The
truth is, a resident who spends $29.99/month gets the same 100 channels and
visual and sound quality as a resident who chooses not to, despite the claims
made by Comcast.
It shouldn’t surprise you that many of the
residents of my building are elderly and were easily cajoled into buying something
they didn’t need.
Coincidentally, carrying charges went up
an average of $25/month after the “upgrade” began.
This was the first time in nearly 20 years that rates have risen. The building told us it was due to additional
heat demand in the cold winter, but one has to wonder. The Comcast people certainly didn’t work for
free in “upgrading” the building, and one must presume that the cost of maintaining
digital capable cable is more than the old analog cable.
Residents like myself who have foolishly
not chosen to “upgrade” to digital need not despair if they now feel like
a stone-age idiot. At least once a
month I get flyers or brochures from Comcast explaining why I should go digital
and offering hook-up deals.
I thought I had outsmarted Comcast by opting
out of the “upgrade.” When Comcast was rewiring units on my floor for digital
capability, I exercised my then-option to stay on the “old” system, and told
my building that Comcast was not to enter my apartment to “upgrade” my cable.
Shortly after the “upgrade” project was complete,
I still had my same old cable system (but now with the full complement of
100 “free”
A few months after my floor was upgraded, I came home and was surprised to find a service
paper from Comcast on my desk. They
had been in my unit attempting to “upgrade” me, even though I had not requested
this or any kind of service. The service
paper told me that I was not “upgraded” because my TV was too old, and that
I needed to buy a new tv set at once!
You read right.
My television, an RCA from the mid 80's, is only “cable capable.” In order to be “upgraded” (or more accurately,
remain on the analog antenna), I needed a “cable ready” set. The cable guy failed to notice that my VCR is
cable ready, and that I can get cable through the VCR. Plus, I already have the ability to access the
100 channels they’d like to sell me for $29.99/month.
Needless to say, I was livid that Comcast
had been in my apartment without my consent and planned to “upgrade” me against
my wishes. I went to see my building
manager, who at least reassured me that someone had accompanied the cable
guy into my unit. The manager then
explained that Comcast didn’t need my consent or knowledge to enter my unit,
so long as they didn’t go in alone. This
is in the contract the building signed with Comcast.
The contract also requires that every unit be “upgraded,” even if it
is vacant or the tenant (like myself) doesn’t want the upgrade.
I explained that I had exercised my right
to opt-out and had given written notice of this to the office.
The office apologized that this paper was “lost,” but told me that
Comcast’s contract with them requires every unit to be “upgraded to digital”
within a year, whether I want it or not. The
manager said the “upgrade” would give me more channels for “free,” and that
if I ever decided to watch the cable, I could pick up the channel list at
the front desk.
My building told me that there’s nothing
I need to do right now, since Comcast is done with their free “upgrades.” Sooner or later, I suppose, Comcast will realize
that I’ve never been upgraded, prosecute me as a cable-tv evader, and make
me pay them $29.99/month for a jail cell with a cable ready tv, digital cable
and no off button.
